In his attempt to teach us a thing or two about the sky Denis Geake would take his large telescope outside and let us look at the stars and moon and the planets. It was such a neat feeling to be looking at something so far away and have it feel so close. But if we looked through the wrong end even something at the tip of the scope would appear to be miles away. Somehow my telescope got turned around and everything seems so far away. I know I am not the first and only pregnant woman to feel this since I was previously warned about this phenomenon and over dose of pregnancy hormones. How is it that time has slowed to a complete halt, how is it that two weeks can feel like two decades?
This morning my mom told me that as she held my brother's new baby she thought of me and the joy I will feel as I hold my brand new baby for the first time and every time after as I look him over and feel his soft skin and tiny toes. She cried as she said these things but I didn't. It no longer feels real. I know that I am pregnant but I don't know that I will be holding my brand new tiny son in a few weeks. I want to throw the backwards telescope out so I can see life the way it really is and not through a distorted lens. I want to believe that it will soon happen so I can enjoy my last moments of pregnancy. This has been such a beautiful experience that I want to end it with feelings of joy and excitement not feelings of impatience.
Good Luck ending it without impatience! Its a very hard LONG time to wait those last few weeks! and you are right all of a sudden you dont feel its really real! And even more when you start having the contractions come you'll be like "no way its not happening"
ReplyDelete:0) Its just one of those things and then all of a sudden you're baby Brigham will be turning 4 months old like my Abbie and you'll wonder where the heck that time went! Lifes weird that way! Good luck in everything Becca I am really excited to hear how things went and to see your new little one who will make your heart ache with so much love you'll finally understand the saying "I love you so much it hurts" It really does hurt physically! Its SO great!
The whole thing didn't feel real to me until I was actually pushing. I know, you'd think it would have felt real once I got in the hospital bed, but it didn't. The last month of my pregnancy was the worst because it went by so slow!! But like Alison said, soon you'll be saying "where the heck did the time go?"
ReplyDeleteAnd I still need to bring by your gift. At this rate Brigham will be 6 months before I get it to you :).
I keep meaning to tell you....You're welcome to come over anytime and check out my cloth diapers and whatnot. I'll share my limited knowledge with ya. :)
ReplyDeleteWhen I was pregnant I honestly couldn't remember a time when my body wasn't pregnant and I couldn't picture a time in the future when it wouldn't be pregnant. Even my eyelashes felt pregnant. I couldn't remember what it was like to bend over and pick things up or to not get tired after five minutes of standing or to sleep comfortably. It's crazy what you go through. But now (it's only been six months) and I can't believe how fast my body has bounced back and how little I remember about the uncomfortableness of pregnancy. I definitely have much more appreciation for my body and the things that are easy now (running, lifting things, getting up and down, crawling in a small space...). Good luck with delivery!!
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